Gossip, Gossip and more Gossip

It is a common held belief that the Volkswagen Golf is the epitome of a cool car; style, performance and an impressive history all firmly place it in a very favourable light with the general public. Since its introduction in 1974 the Golf has walked that precarious tightrope of great motoring, but at a reasonable price. When I put my brain into gear, I can’t help but question the Golf’s credibility. Let me take you through my thinking and see if I can get you on board.

I have nothing but fond memories of the VW Golf. My Grandfather owned a dark blue 1984 Golf MkII which was a huge part of my childhood; providing the transport for literally thousands of trips all over the country over many years. I remember the grunt of the engine, the sporty shape of the bodywork and the slightly musty smell of the interior…but that may have been my Grandfather’s fault rather than an deliberate Volkswagen specification. My point is that the VW Golf has a marvellous heritage and undoubtedly holds a place in the heart of anyone who has spent time in one. The question is, how can a car I associate with an elderly relative ever be considered cool?

In most circles, the VW Golf is recognised as ecologically sound as the automotive industry is going to get without resorting the poorly-performing hybrids, electric powered cars that will only get you to the end of your drive before conking out, or bio-fuel which will probably involve you shovelling tonnes of bovine excrement into your car. But since when has environmentally considerate motoring ever been considered cool? It may be important for the future of the planet, but it is without a doubt entirely uncool. When have tree-huggers looked like anything more than tussled-hair layabouts, with personal hygiene issues.

In recent years every other car manufacturer has began to produce hot hatchbacks and stylish superminis that have reduced Volkswagen’s uniqueness to practically zero. The Vauxhall Corsa, Seat Ibiza, Toyota Aygo and the Fiat 500 have all jumped on the bandwagon and have started pulling high percentages of the market share away from VW. It is perhaps through reputation alone that the Golf has remained one of the brand leaders in this increasingly saturated marketplace. So as well as committing some uncool mistakes, it would appear the VW Golf has lost almost all of its individuality.

To top it all off, Volkswagen’s German lineage hardly reeks of the Fonze does it? German engineering may be efficient and reliable but it rarely makes your knees tremble with joy, or reduce you to tears with its sheer flamboyance. If anything, German motors keep you on the straight and narrow, get you there on time and make no attempts to entertain or intrigue you on the way. So why is the Golf considered a cool car?

The answer is a mystery essentially; like Aurora Borealis or the Bermuda Triangle…it just is a cool vehicle. There’s no reason or logic behind the VW Golf’s continued appreciation, it is just a naturally occurring phenomenon that even the hardiest of boffins would struggle to explain. The Golf is the equation for aero-elasticity of the automotive world; an enigma that continues to baffle and mystify.

The Golf is not the best looking car in its field, nor is it the cheapest or best performing, but for some inexplicable reason it remains one of the most popular, desirable and coolest cars available. I know that I would personally buy it over any of its price range…I will just never be able to put together a cogent arument enough to explain why.